Is closeness an important factor in relationships? If so, how important and why? In this short video, Dr. Sue Johnson, a clinical psychologist and author of “Love Sense,” addresses these questions in clear, direct answers. She suggests that love plays an important role in any relationship, but not because of the physical sensations involved. Instead, she argues that love-making provides vital emotional connection among the participants and that closeness without that connection is like “dancing without music.”
Despite what popular culture claims-that physical contact with the same person quickly becomes boring for the participants-Dr. Johnson argues that people in long term relationships have the most fulfilling and exciting contact. Love contact between people who love each other, she suggests, is more rewarding than haphazard or random $e*ual encounters. In part, Dr. Johnson explains that closeness is a coordinated effort and that familiarity is essential in achieving a desirable outcome for both partners. She also claims that emotional presence is required in order to truly connect in a given love-making experience.
While society often loses this truth in its discussions of closeness, Dr. Johnson believes that an emotional bond is the real secret to satisfying lovemaking.